Saturday, 10 December 2011

Happy Meal

Eight months later I worked up the courage to go back. This time I was better prepared. I had warned them on several fronts. We even covered the "no balloons until the very end and if they are gone, they are gone-no tears" discussion. But going back has forced me to remember. So here once again, is the premise for a short seven scene play, that enacted itself in April 2011.

Scene 1. Unsuspecting Dad takes his two young children to McDonalds.

Scene 2. Dad sends kids to get seats while he orders the meals.

Scene 3. Dad finally reaches the front of the queue, only for his son to run over saying he needs the toilet. Dad duly obliges and takes his place at the back of the queue again.

Scene 4. Dad about to be served when screams come from where his kids are sitting. He runs over to find his son has banged his chin on the table and everyone in that area is looking at him because of the decibels and floods of tears. Dad (trying to remain calm) settles son and returns once more to back of queue.

Scene 5. Dad reaches the front of the queue for the third time and is being served when he looks over to see that son has now fallen headfirst off his chair and is on the floor, once more, crying. Muttering a few words under his breath, dad goes over to where a member of staff is now consoling the child. He returns to make his order and is pleased that the server says she will bring over the meals. He can now sit down, but...

Scene 6. Meals delivered, arguments break out over (1) when to open free toy and (2) who gets to open the monopoly game competition.

Scene 7. Dad is heard to murmur "we're never coming here again..."

The end.

Based on actual events that took place in April 2011. 


  1. McDonalds is a shitstain on the world that makes me ashamed to be American. I support you not taking your kids there anymore.

  2. Must confess I've been back since. Ground rules have been established though, like no opening the present until the "food" is eaten...


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