Thursday, 31 January 2013

Ghazal: Goldmine


Receding harshness of this winter wind,
And wav'ring heart from yours I find, my love.

I speak the anxious moments...gone from here,
And search again to touch your mind, my love.

Alive to taste the beauty of this grace,
Three strands that keep us in this bind, my love.

Will winter haunt with summer's coming light,
If strands pulled tightly can't unwind my love?

Vows yet unbroken golden rings confess,
Gold on the surface must be mined, my love

With ev'ry passing second comes my sight,
For your eyes only have been kind, my love.

You grow my love and we are further wound,
beloved by you proves love is blind, my love.




Note:
Over at dverse poets Samuel Peralta introduced the ghazal poem. It was a new one to me. Samuel writes "Ghazals are beautiful poems, originating in Arabic verse from the sixth century, written traditionally about poetically physical or spiritual love, with a melancholic air of separation or longing." Visit the link if you want to know more about this very interesting type of poem.

My ghazal is based on a sentence from the book of Ecclesiastes which says "A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." I've related it to a marriage relationship and I've included the Hebrew meaning of my name, David, (which is beloved) in the final line. (Read Samuel's notes if you want to know why!) Finally, I must confess I've "mined" some of the lines from a song I'd written a while back. If you're interested here it is:



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18 comments:

  1. Brian Miller31 January 2013 at 13:51

    excellent use of the form....really cool you based in on that line of scripture as well and used your name in hebrew...ha...the couplet that really jumped out at me...

    Will winter haunt with summer's coming light,
    If strands pulled tightly can't unwind my love?

    nice, i like that...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Frank Watson31 January 2013 at 14:32

    I didn't realize it came from a Biblical quote, but it did have a very classical feel to it. Well-written.

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  3. Scarlet31 January 2013 at 14:33

    Lovely refrain of my love and excellent inclusion of the quote ~

    My favorites are the last two couplets ~

    Grace

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  4. Laurie Kolp31 January 2013 at 17:15

    My love works perfect as the refrain... this is so romantic!

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  5. Mary31 January 2013 at 17:15

    Very beautiful and filled with love. Interesting to read about the Ecclesiastics connection! Nicely (and warmly) written to form.

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  6. Bodhirose31 January 2013 at 17:37

    Very creative inspiration culled from a scripture quote...I like that. You did a good job of pulling in different aspects of the marital relationship...thoroughly enjoyed it.

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  7. Anonymous31 January 2013 at 18:39

    I like the feel of this, the strength of the love portrayed from start to finish. Beautiful.
    Gene

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  8. Unknown31 January 2013 at 19:18

    Lovely, the representation of marital love. My favorite lines are the last two.

    You grow my love and we are further wound,
    beloved by you proves love is blind, my love.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Semaphore31 January 2013 at 20:10

    The graceful unwinding of your poem from the Biblical passage underpins the classic atmosphere of the ghazal - and what a wonderful use of your name in the final couplet!

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  10. Amrit Sinha31 January 2013 at 20:28

    "Will winter haunt with summer's coming light,
    If strands pulled tightly can't unwind my love?" I loved this line ... beautifully woven !!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. marousia31 January 2013 at 20:47

    This is so graceful - beautifully wrought words and feelings

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  12. Kathy Reed31 January 2013 at 21:26

    Loved learning about the "strands" and "cord"...this is very neatly written and with love all over the place ;)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sabio Lantz1 February 2013 at 04:40

    Interesting Hebrew scripture meaning behind this. I thought the three stands was the design of your wedding ring. Ecclesiastes was so cool. Lots theologian resent that text -- and rightfully so, it is great!

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  14. Anonymous1 February 2013 at 04:56

    I really enjoyed the way you have woven the Hebrew Scriptures into your poem, from the Ecclesiastes quote to the meaning of your name. I was considering "my love" as a refrain in my own response to Sam's prompt, but at the moment I'm really struggling. Perhaps I'm just not a true romantic.

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  15. Wolfsrosebud1 February 2013 at 05:16

    OK, this was beautiful... I like how you brought elements of nature into your passion

    ReplyDelete
  16. lucychili1 February 2013 at 05:17

    i couldnt fit my name in but also used love and seasons as a theme.
    enjoyed your peom =)

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  17. RMP1 February 2013 at 19:58

    stunning. each stanza is as beautiful as the next, but the question that sits there in the middle is perfect.

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  18. Jennifer Wagner2 February 2013 at 19:41

    Amazing use of the form in such a beautiful write. I really enjoyed your music too! :-)

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for leaving a comment. Have a great day :)

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